


I Can Hear Music

by iamgizy (saddle_tramp)



Category: NSYNC
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-02-16
Updated: 2001-02-16
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:23:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saddle_tramp/pseuds/iamgizy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pairing: TrickyKitten, implied JoLa<br/>Rating: R</p><p>Summary: Songfic inspired by the Beach Boys song <i>I Can Hear Music</i>, lyrics of which are contained in the story. Covers the time from before the guys went to Europe all the way up to December 2002.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can Hear Music

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _This is the way,  
I always dreamed it would be.  
The way that it is, oh oh,  
When you are holding me.  
I never had a love of my own...  
Maybe that's why when we're all alone,  
I can hear music...  
I can hear music,  
The sounds of the city, baby,  
Seem to disappear._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

JC sat in the very back seat of the van, wide awake but trying to ignore the steady flicker of streetlights flashing past his tightly closed eyes and the feel of the warm hand against his stomach, or the solid, muscular thigh draped across his lap. He had _been_ asleep, yeah, but he had awakened almost immediately when Chris turned and cuddled up to him, half asleep and slowly rubbing tiny circles on JC's stomach just above the waist of his jeans.

JC fought the urge to turn towards Chris and pull him into his arms, sure that this must be some sort of test or maybe a sick joke he just didn't get and not about to give the others yet another reason to make fun of him. Chris had done this before but JC hadn't responded at all, at least not in any way he could control, and he didn't think Chris realized how it was affecting him. He hoped he didn't anyway. Everyone knew that it was death in the business for people in a group to hook up, and if Chris had any idea JC was falling for him he was sure Chris would have a screaming fit. _Nothing_ would be allowed to jeopardize their big chance, Chris had made that clear from day one.

It had all started about two weeks ago, when Lance admitted to the group that he was bi. That had encouraged Joey to reveal that he was as well, and then Justin said they were nuts, that girls were where it was at. Lance and Joey had quickly agreed that girls were great and they had gotten into a discussion with Justin about the latest issue of Playboy. They kept talking for a little while before JC suddenly blurted out that he was gay and dead silence fell over the room. After a few minutes JC repeated himself more quietly, then Chris told Joey and Lance they were wusses, that being bi was for people who couldn't make up their minds, and then told Justin to come over to the dark side and forget about women because they weren't nearly as much fun.

A few nights later the guys had decided to have one of their movie parties in the basement of the little house they lived in, and after sending Chris out to buy them a case of beer and some munchies the other four all raced downstairs to grab the best spots. JC had managed to get there first by jumping off the stairs and grabbed the big comfortable recliner, leaving the couch and beanbag chairs in the floor for the other guys as he sprawled comfortably to watch the movie. Ten minutes into the movie, Chris returned with a six pack of Coors and two full grocery bags of chips and cookies. He had given Joe, Lance, and Justin the beer and the food, and then he walked over and climbed into JC's lap like he owned it to watch _Bill And Ted's Bogus Journey_.

JC was too shocked to complain so he had just sat there and let Chris use him as a human pillow, and that had started a trend. Every time they all sat down to watch TV or were stuck in the van driving to or from somewhere Chris sat next to JC, and it always took him no time at all to wind up curled up against JC or even in his lap. JC, who never got enough sleep anyway and had always used movie and driving time for naps, was suddenly unable to relax and sleep even at night because all he could think about was Chris leaning against him, or petting him, or—

JC was jerked out of his thoughts by Chris' hand sliding down from his stomach to lay against the fly of his jeans just below the top button, making JC gasp almost soundlessly at the light pressure just above his hard-on. Chris hummed softly and kissed JC's shoulder – _kissed him!_ – and then snuggled against his chest again and was still, apparently oblivious to the fact JC's mind was in overdrive. He was completely shocked by the fact _Chris_ was touching him _there_ and knew he was hard for him and had _kissed_ him instead of making fun of him.

Chris lifted his head off JC's shoulder a few moments later to lean up next to his ear as he whispered, "Relax, Josh. Get some sleep." Chris kissed JC's cheek and then laid his head on his shoulder again, humming.

After a few minutes of trying his best to convince himself there was nothing unusual going on, JC finally relaxed. JC drifted off to sleep a little while later as Chris continued humming softly against his chest, smiling.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _I can hear music,  
Sweet sweet music...  
Whenever you touch me baby,  
Whenever you're near._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

"What's the deal with you and Chris?"

JC jerked his head up, the sandwich he'd been making completely forgotten as he stared at Justin. "Huh?" he asked, wide-eyed and praying he hadn't really heard—

"What's the deal with you and Chris?" Justin asked again, leaning sideways against the counter and giving JC an unreadable look.

 _God, he did ask that_ , was the first thing that went through JC's mind, then he looked back down to concentrate on spreading mayo on his hoagie. "What are you talking about, Jup?"

JC was proud that his voice sounded calm and normal even though he had no clue what was going on either and was more than a little freaked out over it. Chris had been cuddling up to him for three months and it was driving him nuts, wondering what the hell was going through Chris' mind. He was sure it wasn't a joke anymore, but he had no clue what it _was_.

Justin snorted. "You know exactly what I mean, Jayce. He's like, living in your back pocket all of a sudden... Are you two fucking around behind our backs?"

JC jerked his head up to stare at Justin again, this time annoyed. "I don't do that, Justin. You _know_ that."

Justin rolled his eyes. "Sorry, I forgot, it has to be _true_ _love_ for you to sleep with somebody." JC looked back down at his sandwich and began piling lettuce on it as Justin said, "I _still_ think you and Chris got a little something going on that you're not telling us about. Joey and Lance are makin' bets as to how long it'll be before you're planning a wedding."

JC closed his eyes and tried to think of an answer, then jumped when a familiar hand rested against the small of his back and Chris said, "Hey man, would you make me one?"

JC opened his eyes and looked up to give Chris a weak smile. "Sure... What do you want on it?"

"Mustard and bologna with lots of horseradish," Chris replied immediately, grinning at JC. "And cheese, and some peppers, and—"

JC laughed and cut him off. "Chris that's _gross_ , if you want all that crap on a sandwich you can make your own!"

Chris pouted and stepped closer to lay his head on JC's shoulder and give him a pleading look. "Pretty please?" he whined, "I'm _starving,_ Josh."

JC looked at him for a minute before he shrugged Chris off his shoulder. "I'll make you a hoagie if you want, but that's it."

Chris grinned. "Okay. With horseradish."

"Go get it," JC said with a sigh.

Chris laughed and turned to go to the fridge to get the horseradish. "You're the _best,_ dude."

JC couldn't help a little smile at that, then he glanced up and saw Justin grinning at him and he gave him a warning look. "Don't say it."

Justin lifted his hands in a 'don't hurt me' gesture and gave JC a smug grin. "I ain't sayin' nothing... _Josh_."

JC narrowed his eyes and was about to reply when Chris put the horseradish down on the counter in front of him with a thump.

"Did you know Lance is gonna color is hair?" Chris asked, looking at Justin.

Justin grinned. "You're kidding!"

"Nope," Chris replied, smirking. "He and Joe are in the bathroom right now, they're gonna bleach it blond."

"I gotta see this," Justin said, grinning, then he reached out to poke JC in the ribs. "You're gonna tell me eventually man, we both know it."

Justin turned and hurried from the room as Chris hopped up to sit on the counter, watching JC finish making a sandwich for himself and listening to the laughter coming from down the hall as Justin teased Lance.

Chris waited until JC was almost done making Chris’ sandwich before he finally asked, "Tell him what?"

JC shrugged, not looking up. "He's gotten it into his head I'm seeing someone without telling him."

Chris worried at his lower lip with his teeth for a minute, then asked quietly, "Are you?"

JC looked up, meeting Chris' serious gaze as he said quietly, "I don't know. You tell me."

Chris stared at him a long moment, then hopped off the counter and walked out of the kitchen.

JC closed his eyes and let his head fall forward, then jerked his head up as he clearly heard Chris say, "Timberlake, you better quit buggin' my boy about me or I'll kick your ass!"

Justin whooped loudly as Lance yelled, "Hah! I _knew_ it! Pay up, Joe!"

JC picked up the top half of Chris' roll and started spreading horseradish on it, grinning.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _Lovin' you...  
It keeps me satisfied.  
And I can't explain, oh no,  
The way I'm feeling inside.  
You look at me, we kiss and then,  
I close my eyes and here it comes again..._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

JC woke up shivering even though he was under three blankets. He watched the small light over his head flickering slightly for several minutes before he rolled towards the edge of the tiny bunk, opening the curtain to let in even colder air as he leaned to look out at the clock on the wall nearby. He made a face when he saw that he had been asleep only an hour, but he was about to climb out of bed anyway when Chris stepped out of the bathroom and walked quickly towards him, naked except for a worn pair of Smurf boxers.

"Get back in where it's warm, baby," Chris said quietly as he reached him, making shooing motions with his hands. "Why are you awake?"

JC scooted back against the wall, pulling the blankets back and pretending to pout as he whispered back, "I got cold."

Chris gave him a wicked little smirk and climbed into bed, barely managing to fit into the tiny bunk as he slid his arms around JC. "Sorry, baby, I had to pee."

JC pulled the blankets up around Chris, still pouting, then moaned softly and closed his eyes as Chris' warm hand slid into his boxers.

Chris put his lips near JC's ear to add, "I'll heat you up again," before he began trailing nibbling kisses along his neck.

"Sounds good," JC whispered softly, then someone turned off the light in the bunk and his eyes flew open in surprise as to see Justin hanging down from the one above and glaring at him.

"Shut up you two, people are tryin' to _sleep_ ," Justin said gruffly, then shut the curtain to their bunk. "And if you two start fucking around _again_ , I swearI'm gonna kill you both and burn your mangy asses to heat the goddamn bus."

JC hid his face against Chris' neck, trying not to laugh out loud as Chris grinned and said quietly, "You're just jealous."

"Damn right," Justin replied petulantly. "Why can't we have any girls on the bus?"

"They'd fuck up the vibe," Joey said sleepily from the upper bunk across the aisle.

Justin's curtain rattled as he shut it, grumbling, "Or get fucked."

"Worry about fucking some other time, dammit, we have a show in Hamburg in six hours," Lance rumbled from the bunk below Joey's, his normally bass voice even lower. " _Everyone_ shut the fuck up and go to _bed_."

Chris lightly nipped JC's earlobe, then said, "We're all in bed _already,_ Mr. Bass, _sir_."

"Shutup asshole," Lance grumbled. "Just go to sleep."

Chris opened his mouth to reply again but JC kissed him before he could, giving Chris something much better to do than baiting the other three at five am.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _I can hear music  
I can hear music  
The sound of the city, baby,  
Seems to disappear._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

JC smiled as he let Justin guide him down the hall, feeling like a great weight had lifted from his shoulders as they walked out of the courthouse into the bright sunshine and were greeted by cheering fans. JC looked over at Chris to meet his boyfriend's triumphant grin then and couldn't help but grin back, his blue eyes sparkling. They'd _won_ and they were free of that slimeball – well, mostly – and could go into the studios to work on the next album. They had already chosen the name, _No Strings Attached,_ and even lined up twenty tracks they wanted to use, including several that JC had written.

JC was still amazed by that, and so proud that the other guys thought his songs were good enough for their album that he was about to burst. In just a few months they would be on the road again and performing their music – _his_ music! – for the thousands of fans who had stuck by them through the lengthy court battle. JC paused with the others as reporters asked them questions, answering on complete autopilot as his mind hummed with plans for the studio, and when they finally went to the van and climbed in, he automatically went to the back to sit with Chris.

As the van pulled out into traffic Justin turned to look at JC, grinning. "You actually sounded like you meant that, Jayce."

"Meant what?" JC asked, smiling even though he had absolutely no clue what Justin was talking about.

Lance laughed and turned to look at JC. "Do you even know what you said to those reporters?"

"Um..."

JC trailed off, thinking hard, and Chris grinned as he slipped an arm around JC's waist and leaned over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "You're amazing, baby, did you know that?"

JC looked surprised, then beamed. "Thank you."

Justin snorted and looked at Lance as he said, "And when _I_ don't remember something I said five minutes ago, he calls _me_ an idiot!"

"That's only because you are," Chris replied, leaning forward to swat Justin lightly on the back of the head.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _Whoa, yeah, I can hear music...  
Sweet sweet music...  
Whenever you touch me baby.  
Whenever you're near._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 _In a room full of people you're the only one around,_   
_  
And nothing in this world could ever bring us down.  
Baby I'll be there, telling you I care, this I swear,  
It's just the two of us, the two of us._

 _  
_

JC looked up from his notebook, smiling softly in the dim early morning light at the man sleeping next to him as he waited for the next line of the song to come to him. He let his gaze roam over Chris' face and down his chest, admiring the smooth, firm muscle that was lightly dusted with fine black hairs until he suddenly smiled and looked down, beginning to write again.

 

 _It just gets better with each day..._   
_  
I always wanted to tell you,  
But I was so afraid..._

 _  
_

JC closed his eyes a moment, letting the soft music only he could hear repeat over and over in his head until he looked down and his pen began to move across the page again.

 

 _I toss and turn when I'm alone,_   
_  
And I just can't wait til you get home.  
Waiting for your call cause tonight we're gonna do it all,  
It's just the two of us.  
Cause I'm thinking about you day and night,  
And I just can't get you off my mind.  
When you get a minute baby I was thinking we could hook up,  
It's just the two of us, the two of us._

 

"What ya writin', babe?" Chris asked then, his voice low and scratchy with sleep.

JC looked over to give him a sweet smile. "G'morning. A new song."

"Can I see it yet?" Chris asked softly, smiling as he sat up.

JC nodded, then turned away from Chris to reach for the bedside table and get Chris his glasses, turning back to hand them to him as he said, "I couldn't get the melody out of my head all night, so I decided to do something with it. I think I've done just about all I can do without my keyboard now, though. I need to play the music as I work on it for the rest."

Chris hummed as he put his glasses on, watching JC's eyes brighten as a grin bloomed on his face.

"Yeah, that's it! How'd you know?"

Chris returned the grin, his warm brown eyes sparkling as JC handed him his notebook. "You were humming in your sleep again."

JC chuckled, looking sheepish. "Sorry."

Chris leaned over to give him a quick kiss. "Don't be, baby. I love listening to you, even when you're asleep." Chris looked down at JC's notebook then and began reading over the song, completely aware of what a privilege it was to see it before JC had put the finishing touches on it. Chris was probably the only person besides Justin who knew JC never wrote his songs to or about girls, but instead went through later and made it 'acceptable'.

"I'm glad, since I never know when I'm doing it." JC watched Chris read, smiling.

Chris tried to put the music and the melody together, humming softly as his eyes ran over the lyrics, then Chris finally looked up at him, grinning. "I love it, and it sounds like a great idea to me. Didn't you say you needed your keyboard to do any more?" JC nodded, grinning again, and Chris turned to put the notebook and his glasses on the bedside table on his side of the bed before he turned back to reach for JC as he grinned and said, "Then lets hook up, baby."

JC giggled and let Chris lower him back on the bed as he said softly, "I thought you'd like that part."

Chris moved over him, smirking. "Oh hell yeah." He lowered his head to kiss JC, slowly exploring JC's mouth with his tongue as JC arched up against the hand that slid across his chest.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _I hear the music all the time, yeah.  
I hear the music, hold me tight now baby.  
I hear the music all the time.  
I hear the music.  
I hear the music._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

"Josh?" Chris asked, wondering what JC was doing as he walked into the den where JC had spent the last three hours.

"Hmm?" JC replied, not really paying attention to him as he looked down at his little G4, his fingers dancing over the keys as he chatted with Tony.

Chris grinned and moved up behind JC, reading over his shoulder as he said, "I'm horny."

"Okay," JC answered absently, typing, _'Hey man, c'mon, you gotta come with us, it'll be good.'_

"I'm naked and hard, and you need to put that damn thing away," Chris added as he kicked off his shoes, still reading over JC's shoulder as Tony answered, _'You sure Jayce? My stuff isn't really very teen pop y'know.'_

"That's good," JC replied, then typed, _'Yeah Tony, I'm_ _SURE _... You have to do this!'__

"I'm gonna jerk off while I wait," Chris said next, perfectly deadpan even though he was grinning as he unbuttoned the flannel shirt he was wearing. _'Okay,'_ Tony typed, _'I'll think about it.'_

"Uh-huh," JC said, grinning suddenly. _'*does a happy dance* Please do, man, it'll be so good for your career!'_

Chris shrugged out of the flannel shirt and then leaned forward to look over JC's shoulder just as ' _I gotta go, gig in a few hours'_ popped up on the screen. Chris smirked and started unfastening his jeans as he said, "Your hair's on fire, baby."

JC typed _'TTYL'_ then watched Tony sign off before he looked up, blinking quickly as he turned to look at Chris. "My hair's _what_?! And I thought you said you were naked!"

Chris laughed and pushed his jeans and boxers down, then kicked out of them. "I am now, baby. Turn that off, it's time for bed."

JC gave Chris a slow once-over, a grin slowly blooming on his face before he turned and shut the PowerBook down. JC jumped up as soon as he had flipped it shut and started towards Chris, pulling his t-shirt over his head as he said, "Forget bed, there's a couch right here."

Chris smirked and backed away towards the door. "What if I don't want to forget the bed 'cause I've got a surprise waiting for us?"

JC cocked his head sideways, then grinned and started after him as he began undoing his belt. "Then I guess we'll have to go upstairs, but it's _such_ a long walk..."

"We'll just have to hurry then." Chris turned and walked quickly out of the room, then shrieked and ran back in as Justin yelled, "Jesus!" JC started giggling and watched Chris scramble into his jeans as Justin went on loudly, "Goddammit, I _knew_ I shouldn't have stayed with you two freaks for the weekend! Can't even walk down the fucking _stairs_ without gettin' flashed around here!"

JC walked out into the hallway to see Justin standing at the bottom of the stairs, looking pissed as hell, and couldn't keep from giggling again. "Sorry, Jup. We forgot you were here."

"Aren't you two _ever_ gonna grow up?!" Justin asked, exasperated. "I mean, Jesus, you've been together for _years_ , isn't it about time you got past the fucking every five minutes stage?"

Chris snorted as he walked out of the den and moved up behind JC to wrap his arms around JC, kissing JC’s shoulder before he told Justin, "Nope, Jayce is just too damn hot kid. I'll never get enough."

Justin rolled his eyes and walked past them, heading for the kitchen. "Then remind me not to stay with y'all anymore, man. I can't take this shit. I mean, it was bad enough walkin' into the kitchen to find Jayce makin’ breakfast naked, but this... Damn, I did _not_ want to see little Tricky like _that_. Ever."

JC tried not to laugh at Justin's disgusted tone but he started giggling again anyway, Chris shaking against his back with silent laughter, and after another moment they were leaning against each other giggling helplessly while Justin grumbled to himself about insanity being contagious.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _I can hear music,  
I can hear music,  
The sound of the city, baby,  
Seems to disappear._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

JC stood behind Chris, his chin resting on Chris' shoulder as they both watched Joey pace back and forth looking worried as hell.

It was almost four in the morning and they had already spent over two hours in a private conference room at Dulles, waiting for Lance's severely delayed flight from Russia to get in. They had all seen him just a few weeks ago and marveled at how happy and excited he was even though he was so thin, but they knew that the man who walked off the Russian plane was going to be a pale, broken reflection. Lance's fondest unrealized dream would have come true for him if the trip had gone as planned, and to be sent home so near the launch date because of a bureaucratic foul up was simply going to devastate him.

Joey had just reached the end of his circuit closest to JC and Chris when the door across the room opened, causing the three of them to turn as Lance walked in slowly, followed by Lonnie and Dre. Lance was calm and looked good at first glance even though he was so very thin, but his normally sparkling green eyes were dead and almost yellow with stress as he walked over to stop a few feet away from Joey. Lance looked into Joey's eyes for a moment, his careful mask slowly slipping away, then he started crying silent tears that almost immediately turned into wracking sobs.

Joey stepped forward to put his arms around Lance, tears in his own eyes as said softly, "I'm so sorry, baby."

Lance didn't reply, instead clinging to Joey as the door to the room opened again and Lonnie and Dre both left. JC and Chris moved closer after a long moment to each put a hand on Lance's back, wordlessly offering their support as the door to the room opened again and Justin hurried in, his brow furrowed with worry.

"My flight was delayed," Justin said quietly. "There was bad weather in Chicago."

JC gave Justin a sad smile and said quietly, "He just got here too." He moved closer to Chris so Justin could join them.

Justin surprised them all by leaning in to kiss Lance's temple, lifting one hand to gently stroke Lance's back as he whispered against Lance's hair, "It'll be okay, sweetheart, we'll get through it together." Justin continued rubbing Lance's back for a long moment, his blue eyes sad as he watched Lance cry, then he finally looked up at the other three, first meeting Joey's eyes and then looking at JC and Chris' as he half-asked, "We can handle _anything_ as long as we stay together, right?"

Chris nodded, smiling at Justin, and had just opened his mouth to speak when Lance said softly, "Five against the world."

Joey gave Lance a squeeze and kissed his forehead. "That's right."

Lance rubbed his cheek against Joey's chest, then sniffled and straightened, giving Joey a watery smile as he said, "Hi honey, I'm home."

Joey chuckled. "Welcome back, baby."

Lance leaned up to give Joey a lingering kiss, then smiled softly at him. "It's good to be home." Lance let go of Joey and turned to look up at the other three, stepping away from Joey to pull all three into a hug. "I missed you all so much. I'm never doing something like that again. If I can't be with my family on the weekends, then dammit, I'm stayin' home."

Joey stepped up behind Lance and joined the hug then, and they were all still holding Lance five minutes later when Lonnie came back to tell them the airport needed the conference room.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~  
 _I can hear music,  
Sweet sweet music,  
Whenever you touch me baby,  
Whenever you're near._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

"Our sixth Christmas together," JC said quietly, smiling as he sat in a big overstuffed chair with Chris in his lap, both of them watching their best friends sleep in the flickering light from the tree. Joey and Lance were sound asleep on the couch, Lance half in Joey's lap, while Justin snored softly in the other armchair, his knees tucked up against his chest and his cheek resting on the back of the chair.

"Six years," Chris repeated, turning in JC's arms to smile at him before he kissed him softly and then added, "Best six years of my life."

JC smiled at him. "Because all your dreams came true?"

Chris shook his head.

JC thought a moment, and then smiled again. "Because you never have to worry for your mother and sisters again."

Chris shook his head again, his smile widening as he leaned close and whispered, "Because I have you."

 

 

~End


End file.
